The Same Life That Brings Pain Also Brings Joy
Adversity has a way of making us loom and gloom. Here’s how to recalibrate.
My Dad told me when I was young that waves come in sets of seven, and if ever I found myself caught in the undertow and struggling to find air and in a panic to look for and swim towards the light. I’ve had occasion over the years to turn to that sage advice, not only when I was tumbling around in the wilds of the ocean, but also when I’ve been caught in an emotional tsunami.
Now, please don’t confuse “the light,” in the case of emotional distress, to be an advocation for blind optimism or perpetual positivity. Despite the “just be positive” mantra, touted by some and impulsively practiced by many, positive thinking has little sustainable positive effect on how we cope or heal when life pulls the rug out from beneath us. For instance, studies show that denying or hiding feelings leads to more stress on the body. Others show that trying not to think about something actually makes you think about it more. The pressure to appear okay, even strong in the face of adversity invalidates the wide spectrum of…